The Cycle
by Polish
Summary: It's a cycle, a cycle of abuse...Harry is abusive to his children, and his wife Ginny. They cannot blame him, he hurt them yelled at them but they cannot blame him, for with him the pain despair and abuse came from childhood.  Song fic
1. Harry James Potter

This fanfic is different from my usual lighthearted and funny fics, so I just thought you might want to know... I don't own this it's the property of J.K. Rowling and anyone else who does have rights. So don't sue me... This is NOT a happy fic.

The Cycle

It's a cycle, a cycle of abuse...harry is abusive to his children, and his wife Ginny. They cannot blame him, he hurt them yelled at them but they cannot blame him, for with him the pain despair and abuse came from childhood a wicked cycle that has still yet to end. -Finished- Each is done to a song.

* * *

><p><strong>HARRY JAMES POTTER<strong>

**I wanna love,**

**I wanna leave.**

**I want you to love me,**

**I want you to leave me.**

**I want to stand where I can see,**

**I'm watching you love me,**

**And I'm watching you leave me now.**

Another day, another bruise... I yelled at them again, I called them all such awful names, and Ginny my sweet spitfire Ginny is so run down, I love them but I can't get close to them, for I am such a freakish wretched thing, no, don't come near me, I'll lose it again.

I did it again today; I struck gin, called them names again, I'm breaking them down even though I'm breaking apart inside.

I came home drunk, but I didn't do anything, is this my answer?

Lily is crying again...I slapped her, I ran away afterwards, this cannot continue,

**I wish I could be,**

**Somebody else.**

**I wish I could see,**

**You and myself.**

**I wish there was something inside me,**

**To keep you beside me.**

**And say,**

**What you really feel.**

**You know i need,**

**Something that's real.**

**I wish there was something inside me,**

**To keep you beside me.**

Off I go, where I fall is where I land! I sing as I write up the papers, I leave everything to them.

Gin she tries to argue with me and I hex her, I say I will kill her, the children and burn everything to the ground if she doesn't take the children and leave. I run at her screaming, she flees with the kids, I put everything back where it should be, I place it all clean and in site. Loose ends they tangle down and then take flight but never tie me down, never tie me down, I sing as I fly my Firebolt as high as I can and then let go, as I fall I laugh and think of the good times, before my broom comes and saves me. I... cry, I cannot end it that way...

**I wanna know if I could be,**

**Someone to turn to,**

**That could never hurt you.**

**But i know what you think of me,**

**You had a breakthrough,**

**And now I'm just bad news for you.**

I cried today in this empty house,

I finally finished it! I smile without humor,

**I wish I could be,**

**Somebody else.**

**I wish i could see,**

**You and myself.**

**I wish there was something inside me,**

**To keep you beside me.**

**And say,**

**What you really feel.**

**You know i need,**

**Something that's real.**

**I wish there was something inside me,**

**To keep you beside me.**

I visit my Father once, more I say so thanks to him and leave I hear him weep...

I sit down in the garden it's nice, I sit amongst the pretty flowers,

I walk inside...so slowly I enter everyone's rooms and kiss their pillows goodbye.

I visit Privet drive once more and see where it all started, I visit Godric's hollow and rage at them for leaving me, the place where it all began.

I go back home, and send a note to Ginny to come back that I'm better, I drink the mixture and lie down in bed, it's slowly getting dark.

**I should've told you everything.**

**I never gave you anything.**

**I should've told you everything.**

**If I could give you anything,**

**Then I would tell you everything.**

So dark, and yet I do this for their mercy, I beg for forgiveness for I shall never see them off to Hogwarts, never see them graduate, I'm gone, but still here, I pray that they will forgive me someday.

I see their faces, laughing happily, myself with them...

I see Snape my should be father...

**I wish I could be,**

**Somebody else.**

**I wish I could see,**

**You and myself.**

**I wish there was something inside me,**

**To keep you beside me.**

**And say,**

**What you really feel.**

**You know I need,**

**Something that's real.**

**I wish there was something inside me,**

**To keep you beside me.**

Get darker

I see my Hogwarts years…

…So much darker...

I see my uncles...

Darkness comes closer I cannot see the world anymore...

I see Ginny...

I love you...

Darkness...

**I should've told you everything.**

**I should've told you everything.**

**I should've told you everything.**

* * *

><p><strong>HARRY JAMES POTTER<strong>

The song is called Keeper by Yellowcard, I personally think you should listen to it while reading this fic.


	2. Ginerva Molly Potter Nee Weasley

**GINERVA MOLLY POTTER NEE WEASLEY**

* * *

><p><strong>I'd thought you'd gone<strong>

**Packed all your bags**

**You are bleeding my heart**

**Tearing me down**

The hits, and shoves were small at first I thought he was being playful, but then it became a nightmare, a nightmare that would bring in three little ones, I cried as he yelled at them, said such cruel things.

**How could you be so cold**

**That we are over**

**You're leaving our home**

**Why can't we cope**

One night he went crazy throwing things and shrieking to high heavens the kids were up in an instant, and heading for the Floo, I hadn't told them to do that, they went to my brothers house while I tried to subdue harry.

It's horrible...

So very very horrible...

**I don't recall**

**How we got here**

**It's a pain that we fight**

**Time is a tyrant**

I pick up the kids the next day and we go back, Harry is better,

**It blinded my eyes**

**We drifted so far to opposite sides**

**But I can't accept it**

Harry is getting worse; the abuse is getting harder and harder to deal with...

**Love makes a woman stay**

**Love makes a man to remain**

**Love is the strongest flame**

I can't take it anymore, I confront him and he loses it, he tells me to grab the kids and get out before he kills me, I stare at him in shock he casts and cutting curse and hits my cheek, I spring into action dodging curse, hexes and jinxes, grabbing the kids and fleeing the house, while harry howls in rage and despair.

**I think you know**

**We are not chance**

**We are words on the sea**

**Floating to shore**

My heart hurts...

The kids are asleep and I'm sitting with my knees to my chest weeping and talking to Hermione, she tries to help, but she really can't.

**And the bottle, that's me**

**You are the essence**

**Your song's on my page**

**And I need your message**

I get a letter to come back, I do...

**Love makes a woman stay**

**Love makes a man to remain**

**Love is the strongest flame**

I came alone, without the children , it's just as well I find him in bed, he's asleep but no matter what I do he still sleeps, I see the vial and the letter,

**It's hard not to take us for granted**

**And I made the mistake of not waterin our garden**

**But I need you to know and believe it**

**That our dreams are align with the stars, just trust it**

I ... weep,

**Love makes a woman stay**

**Love makes a man to remain**

**Love is the strongest flame**

Despite how he treated us, he still tried, he left everything to us, everything...but himself I lie beside him and hold him, he's gone,

**Love makes a woman stay**

**Love makes a man to remain**

**Love is the strongest flame**

I HATE THEM!

IT'S ALL THEIR FAULT!

I HATE DUMBLEDORE! I HATE HIS FAKE SYMPATHY! HIS FAKENESS!

IT'S HIS FAULT THAT HARRY TURNED OUT THIS WAY! IF HE HAD PUT HIM SOMEWHERE ELSE HE WOULD BE FINE!

I wept as he was placed in a room of this house, alive yet dead, I cry again. Snape appears he offers me a way out of this.

We are standing looking at him, he looks to be asleep and he is

...I weep.

**Come back to me**

**Reach in and then step**

**Let's start with the hurt**

**You can be free**

Snape offers again...I leave the room

We bury him the next week

**I am the man on the moon**

**Gravity's pulling me closer to you**

**Our loves of the world go...**

**GINERVA MOLLY POTTER NEE WEASLEY**

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><p>The song used is Strongest Flame by the Paper Tongues.<p> 


	3. Hermione Jane Weasley Nee Granger

**HERMIONE JANE WEASLEY NEE GRANGER**

* * *

><p><strong>Step one: you say we need to talk<strong>

**He walks, you say sit down, it's just a talk**

**He smiles politely back at you,**

**You stare politely right on through**

**Some sort of window to your right**

**As he goes left and you stay right**

**Between the lines of fear and blame**

**You begin to wonder why you came**

It's funny really; I was always just the girl who nobody wanted to befriend

I was the No-It-All that jumped up and was the teacher's pet

I...never was that with Harry

Harry was my first real friend, then Ron, and Neville and Luna...

I knew the signs...

I saw the warnings...but...but

**Where did I go wrong?**

**I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along **

**In the bitterness and**

**I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

I...

...Was a coward I didn't want to lose that friendship...

**Let him know that you know best**

**Cause after all you do know best**

**Try to slip past his defense**

**Without granting innocence**

For all my books and cleverness...I really am useless...

I saw the beginning...I could have gotten help...but...

**Lay down a list of what is wrong**

**The things you've told him all along**

**And pray to God he hears you**

**And pray to God he hears you**

...But...

I...

Was coward

**Where did I go wrong?**

**I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along **

**In the bitterness and**

**I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

I chickened out!

WHY DID I DO THAT! I COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING!

Some Gryffindor I turned out to be!

Ron came home with a bruised hand, and I saw Ginny and the kids...

Ginny was bruised and the children looked frightened...

**As he begins to raise his voice**

**You lower yours and grant him one last choice**

**Drive until you lose the road**

**Or brake with the ones you've followed**

**He will do one of two things**

**He will admit to everything**

**Or he'll say he's just not the same**

**And you'll begin to wonder why you came**

I went to their house to talk to harry but... all I did was drink the tea he offered and said nothing...

**Where did I go wrong?**

**I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along **

**In the bitterness and**

**I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

My tongue wouldn't speak...

How do you save a life?

A life...

When it's ending right before your very eyes...

I wept as I left...

**Where did I go wrong?**

**I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along **

**In the bitterness and**

**I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

**How to save a life**

**How to save a life**

Sometime later the children came through our Floo saying that mom was still there talking to their raging father...I gave them chocolate and still I could do nothing...

How to save a life?

Ginny came later and as she spoke crying as she did...I still couldn't find the words to say...

Sometime later I heard about his death...

**Where did I go wrong?**

**I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along **

**In the bitterness and**

**I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

I went to his grave full of regret...

Regret...

That I couldn't save a life...

**Where did I go wrong?**

**I lost a friend**

**Somewhere along **

**In the bitterness and**

**I would have stayed up with you all night**

**Had I known how to save a life**

**How to save a life**

**How to save a life**

**HERMIONE JANE WEASLEY NEE GRANGER**

* * *

><p>The song is How to Save a Life by The Fray<p> 


	4. Ronald Bilius Weasley

**RONALD BILIUS WEASLEY**

* * *

><p><strong>I'm back, back in town<strong>

**And everything has changed**

**I feel, feel let down**

**The faces stay the same**

**I see, see shadows**

**Of who we used to be**

**When I drive, drive so slow**

**Through this memory**

I don't know when I first started to notice, but when I did it was too late, he was already like this.

**When we were only kids**

**And we were best of friends**

**And we hoped for the best**

**And let go of the rest**

I saw the little pushes; I thought he was being playful, until I started to truly see.

The first time I saw the bruises I saw red, I went after that sob, and decked him one, right into a puddle in the street, he didn't even flinch just told me to hit harder, it wouldn't make any difference.

I watched it get worse, I called Aurors but they never came after all who would do anything to stop the boy who lived to save their collective asses?

**I heard, heard myself**

**Say things I'd take back**

**If I could, could retell**

**And make these stories last**

**I see, see shadows**

**Of who we'll always be**

**I drive, drive these roads**

**That made our memories**

Sometimes I wish that Sirius and Remus were still alive, to knock some sense into them, but their gone, only Snape and Dumbledore are left, yeah the other teachers survived but those two... well it would have been better if they had survived as well.

The children came through my Floo in the middle of the night, they said that if daddy went crazy again to come here, I asked who told them that they said daddy told us to do this, I worried for Ginny, she didn't come until the morning sporting more wounds, and a weary look in her eyes. I begged her not to go back she does, taking the kids back with her.

I was at work when I got the call that Ginny had left him from Hermione, I welcome them to my home, its night but I can hear her weeping and talking to Hermione, I go to the kids, and give what comfort I can.

I'm not sure what I was doing when I heard the news...the news that harry had taken that potion, asleep but not really, alive but dead... I just looked forward and forgot the world.

**When we were only kids**

**And we were best of friends**

**And we hoped for the best**

**And let go of the rest**

**Shadows and regrets**

**We let go of the rest**

I went to see him, he was so still like he was dead, instead of just asleep, Hermione is by me weeping again...I take his hand and wonder why.

I was at home holding little lily when I get the news that Harry's dead, I just hold the little one closer and wonder if maybe I should have been the one to do it...

**Everything has changed**

**The Faces stay the same**

**Everything has changed**

**The Faces stay the same**

The funeral is nice, pretty even, but it's also ugly, filled with hypocrites, and liars, condescending well wisher who only want a piece of the pie. Their fixes... damn drug dealers.

I visit his grave yearly on his birthday...a cold wind blows bring the scent of lilies drenched in blood, that's what he always smelt like to me...I say my goodbyes and speak about the year again.

I weep...

I weep for what was lost...

I weep...

**When We were only kids**

**And our time couldn't end**

**And how tall did we stand**

**With the world in our hands**

**And we were only kids**

**And we were best of friends**

**And we hoped for the best**

**And let go of the rest**

**The shadows and regrets**

**We let go of the rest**

**The Shadows and Regrets**

**We let go of the rest**

**RONALD BILIUS WEASLEY**

* * *

><p>The Song is Shadows and Regrets by Yellowcard<p> 


	5. Severus Tobias Snape

SEVERUS TOBIAS SNAPE

* * *

><p><strong>Show me what is mine, take my finger<strong>

**Drag it through where no one else will find**

**Take your time, I have got all night**

**Take your time, in the morning the sun will have its fight**

I will be the first to say that I to hated boy, I hated how he reminded me of what I could have had, of what I had lost, what I had gone through, but as time went by I began to see, truly see him, and began to treat him better.

I saw him through the war, and I saw him get married, I was the first to see the signs, the changes, yet...yet what could I do? Who would believe me?

**Everything you see is all for your taking**

**Climb into my dreams and leave nothing**

**I have got all night, leave nothing**

**In the morning the sun will have its fight**

I wept, when I started to see the bruises, it hurt, I took him aside and spoke to him, it was hard, and the boy barely reacted to me,

**And you know there's nothing**

**That I won't do for you here**

**That I won't do for you here**

**There is nothing that can stand up to my fight**

**For you, for you**

He got smaller, and more fierce, he came to me crying about hurting them but not being able to stop himself, he said he locked himself into a cupboard in order to stop himself from doing it to his children, years went by and his children started to grow, and harry was torn down again.

**So show me what is mine**

**Take my heart and drag it through your life**

**Take your time, I've got all night**

**Take your time in the morning where it's fine**

I wept more...lily what would you do?

**And you know there's nothing**

**That I won't do for you here**

**That I won't do for you here**

**There is nothing that can stand up to my fight**

**For you, for you**

Then he comes to me one evening and tells me everything, he says he's got a plan of what he was going to do, I hand him the potion, for then I see a smile, his eyes sparkle and his whole face lights up, he gets up to leave and I whisper good luck son...

I feel old, and worn and tired like my skin has been stretched too tight over my bones, I watch as he crosses my threshold for the last time I hear a faint, thank you dad. Before the door closes and I fall to the ground and weep...

**WHY! WHY! WHY! IF I DIDNT FULLY BECOME MY FATHER! WHY DID HE HAVE TO BECOME THEM! WHY!**

Ginerva came to me for a cure, for hope for anything, I walked in and saw him, lying there asleep, but still protecting his family, I could feel the blood protection, same as Lily's around them, mobile wards that would go with them no matter where they go, it just needed the blood sacrifice to be perfect, to be fully activated...

Ginny was weeping when I said I could do nothing.

I told her that there was something I could do...I told her to leave

She left

**And you know there is nothing**

**That I can't do for you, dear**

**That I can't do for you, dear**

**There is nothing that can stand up to my fight**

I looked down at my son, the boy I came to see as my son, my perfect imperfect son, the son I always wished and dreaded for. My martyred damned son who I blame **DUMBELDORE** for completely...

I wept

I placed my hands around his neck, and began to squeeze,

I wept for his innocence,

I squeezed harder

I cried for his life

A little harder, he didn't fight me he just looked so angelic

I wailed for the life that could have been...

I finally hear the bells and Harry Potter is dead

The funeral is full of hypocrites, and there is Dumbledore, I hate that man,

I watch and hold Ginny and her children, she has asked me to be there for her and the kids, and I intend to for him my son...

My son...

Whom I murdered with my own hands...

**And you know there is nothing**

**That I can't do for you here**

**That I can't do for you here**

**There is nothing that can stand up to my fight**

**For you, for you**

SEVERUS TOBIAS SNAPE

* * *

><p>This song is called my Fight (for you) by Greg Laswell (went through my whole playlist for this <strong>ONE<strong> song, and I have at least two-thousand songs)


	6. Draconis Lucius Malfoy

DRACONUS LUCIOUS MALFOY

* * *

><p><strong>We all have a weakness<strong>

**Some of ours are easier to identify**

**Look me in the eye**

It's funny really... I used to make fun of him, Id put him down...and yet he still would only react when I would dig too deep.

**And ask for forgiveness**

**We'll make a pact to never speak**

**That word again, yes, you are my friend**

I watched as he got a nice job, a wonderful family, same as me really but...but... I started to notice things, dark things... I had no idea until I overheard Weasley and the know-it-all going on about abuse and how it can transfer onto the victims causing them to react as well.

**We all have something that digs at us**

**At least we dig each other**

The first time I saw potter strike his wife, I noticed something, the dark rage and bitterness, and underneath that a hopeless despair,

**So when weakness turns my ego up**

**I know you'll count on the me from yesterday**

I froze...

... And did nothing...

**If I turn into another**

**Dig me up from under what is covering**

**The better part of me**

Time went by and I caught wind that potter had taken some kind of potion, and went to sleep; he left everything to his wife.

**Sing this song**

**Remind me that we'll always have each other**

**When everything else is gone**

I went to see him

**We all have a sickness**

**That cleverly attaches and multiplies**

**No matter how we try**

I stared at the face of a man who was so strong for so long, but really was just a small child lying beaten in a closet as he wept himself to sleep on an empty stomach.

**We all have someone that digs at us**

**At least we dig each other**

My stomach dropped like lead, I don't know what came over me, I reached down and grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him, screaming for him to wake up and get better, to try again.

**So when sickness turns my ego up**

**I know you'll act as a clever medicine**

**If I turn into another**

**Dig me up from under what is covering**

**The better part of me**

He didn't move...

**Sing this song**

**Remind me that we'll always have each other**

**When everything else is gone**

**Oh, each other when everything else is gone**

I left...

**Oh...**

A short time later I heard of his death,

**If I turn into another**

**Dig me up from under what is covering**

**The better part of me**

I went to the funeral and stood in the back it was a good funeral...

**I hated it!**

The vultures were out offering tainted well wishes, and condolences...

Hypocrites... I hissed out, I walked up and gave a speech that both shamed them and gave respect to him.

I left...

I watched my rival waste away to nothing,

I watched him tear himself apart,

And I...

I...

...did nothing...

**Sing this song**

**Remind me that we'll always have each other**

**When everything else is gone**

**Oh, each other, (sing this song), when everything else is gone**

**Oh, each other, when everything else is gone**

**DRACONUS LUCIOUS MALFOY**

* * *

><p>This song is called Dig by Incubus<p> 


	7. Neville Frank Longbottom

NEVILLE FRANK LONGBOTTOM

* * *

><p><strong>Someone falls to pieces<strong>

**Sleeping all alone**

**Someone kills the pain**

It should have been me...

I should have been the boy who lived not Harry.

But it was Harry...

Harry...

**Spinning in the silence**

**She finally drifts away**

**Someone gets excited**

**In a chapel yard**

**And catches a bouquet**

**Another lays a dozen**

**White roses on a grave**

Harry the strong one...

Harry the brave one...

**Lies**! **Harry wasn't any of that**!

**I was the brave one**!

While Harry...

**And to be yourself is all that you can do, hey**

**To be yourself is all that you can do**

Harry was the weak one.

**Someone finds salvation in everyone**

**Another only pain**

**Someone tries to hide himself**

**Down inside himself he prays**

**Someone swears his true love**

**Until the end of time**

**Another runs away**

**Separate or united**

**Healthy or insane**

The one who needed someone to take care of him...

**And to be yourself is all that you can do, hey (all that you can do)**

**To be yourself is all that you can do (all that you can do)**

**To be yourself is all that you can do, hey (all that you can do)**

**To be yourself is all that you can do**

It should have been me.

I noticed it first, hard not to when you've been beaten yourself;

**Even when you've paid enough**

**Been pulled apart**

**Or been held up**

**Every single memory of**

**The good or bad**

**Faces of luck**

**Don't lose any sleep tonight**

I watched and saw the pain he went through, what he did to his wife and children

I hug my wife and child closer and think...

It should have been me...

**I'm sure everything**

**Will end up alright**

**You may win or lose**

I heard about his death, and went to the funeral, the only thing I can think to say is.

It should have been me

**But to be yourself is all that you can do, yeah**

**To be yourself is all that you can do, oh**

I give a speech and leave I see Ginny weeping with Snape

I look back at the grave one last time and think

It should have been me...

**To be yourself is all that you can do, hey (all that you can do)**

**To be yourself is all that you can do (all that you can do)**

**To be yourself is all that you can**

**Be yourself is all that you can**

**Be yourself is all that you can do**

**NEVILLE FRANK LONGBOTTOM**

* * *

><p>The song is Be Yourself by Audioslave<p> 


	8. Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore

ALBUS PERCIVAL WULFRIC BRIAN DUMBLEDORE

* * *

><p><strong>How did this happen to me<strong>

**I guess, I'm to blame**

**I'm laying faced down on the pavement and I'm full of pain**

**I just refuse to see**

**My mind is Anarchy**

**Anticipating and debating what is left for me**

**(Me)x3**

I held him as a small child, just a little thing in my arms; he looked up at me with such trust...

... And I left him in hell...

Yes, I knew what was in store for him, but I knew it was for the **Greater Good**

**I am a Liar **

**I am no model figure**

**I am a Monster**

**And I am ashamed**

**Call me the Devil**

**THE GREATER GOOD...**

What a laugh! I could have interrupted at anytime but I didn't I was a

COWARD

**My name's what you prefer**

**I come on shameless**

**But I am ashamed**

**I am ashamed**

I left well enough alone, when I should have acted, but in the end it turned out ok, he killed Voldemort, gained a lovely wife and has continued the potter family bloodline.

FOOL

**I look for help**

**Can't find it anywhere**

**My own reflection is the one sight that I cannot bear**

**Look to the sky and find**

**Even the heavens cry**

**Anticipating and debating what is left to life**

**(Life)x3**

That is what I am as I see him tearing himself apart **piece** by **piece**, he hurts his wife and children...I weep but am too much of a **coward** to do anything for him.

**I am a Liar **

**I am no model figure**

**I am a Monster**

**And I am ashamed**

**Call me the Devil**

**My name's what you prefer**

**I come on shameless**

**But I am ashamed**

**I am ashamed**

In the end it's always me that survives...

**SURVIVES...**

I heard the news that Harry took a potion and is now sleeping but not dead, nor is he truly alive.

I go to see him...

I weep...

I try everything I can to wake him... nothing

**(I am...)**

In the end I weep as I hold him, like the grandfather I should have been, I just hold him and weep.

I weep for what I have done, for the **sins** that I have committed behind a grandfatherly smile, and coos of the **Greater Good**.

Harry sleeps on looking so peaceful...

I leave...

It's not long before Severus walks in weeping, the boys pretty much adopted father, and he tells me the news...

The **NEWS**...

...That I knew was coming, just not from whom...

I go the funeral, I speak, I know not what I say, but I Know it's nothing compared to what could have really been said...

I watch as they bury him, and when they all finally disperse...I stare at the grave and weep, for I am a fool, a fool who never truly grew up in the end.

**I am a Liar **

**I am no model figure**

**I am a Monster**

**And I am ashamed**

**Call me the Devil**

**My name's what you prefer**

**I come on shameless**

**(I am ashamed!)**

**X2**

In the end it doesn't even matter...

I outlived them all...the Marauders, and Lily, oh my children! I caused your deaths! And now your child's gone as well...I can only hope that when I do finally do die that they allow me to say I'm sorry before I'm sent to the pit.

I leave after charming an ever flowering lily...

**But I am ashamed**

**I am ashamed!**

**ALBUS PERCIVAL WULFRIC BRIAN DUMBLEDORE**

* * *

><p>The song is Liars and Monsters by Escape the Fate<p>

I wrote this as a way of saying that not everyone has a perfect ending, when you think about harry potter we all read the books, but when you look beneath the underneath, you'll see that what happened to him was abuse, neglect, and the adults that are supposed to help him just explain it away, you're distracted by the magic and its wonders, that you don't think about what is really being done and said. Child abuse is often enough passed from the aggressors onto the victims and the victims begin to do it as well, with help its less.

I chose these songs because they all seemed to fit the way everyone was thinking in their own grief.

Harry in the novels never talks about it deeply or in depth, so in a way when he starts to rage in book 5, I think if he had had the help he needed, half of his adventures at Hogwarts might have gone differently, he for one probably would have been able to think straight, and not just rush bull headedly into things, although the teachers and friends didn't help much, between enabling him, and tearing him down, then indulging him, he was indirectly spoiled and then torn apart by the wolves. He to me was insufficiently prepared...a babe left alone in the world that is so different from the way he was raised. To me, I don't think he would be this bad off, but I do think he wouldn't have been as well adjusted as they made it seem at the end of book 7.

This whole fic came from me reading chapter 4 from the fanfic Caring for Yin and Yang by DaughterOfAres, the scene is where Dudley was caught after having dragged harry from his bed and stuck him in a closet, and Snape is asking why he did that, and Dudley is just looking at him wondering why Snape is mad at him, he's mad because what he did was wrong. I started this at like 1:45 and ended it at 2:05 in the morning, it just came on and I had to write it down. So please remember that child abuse is bad, and more often than not it becomes a cycle...and endless cycle that has yet to truly end.


End file.
